Wait, Say What?

Have you ever heard something, something you’ve heard hundreds of times but for some reason you really listen to it, and wonder, how have I missed that forever?

It happened to me this week. I was in the car, driving home from work and listening to Magic 96.5 (your Christmas station), when “It’s The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” came on the radio. The third verse is:

There’ll be parties for hosting
Marshmallows for toasting
And caroling out in the snow
There’ll be scary ghost stories
And tales of the glories of the
Christmases long, long ago

A. Please don’t hear me say that I do Christmas the right way and if you don’t do what I do then you do Christmas wrong but, in my life, I have never – to my knowledge – toasted a marshmallow. I’ve put a marshmallow on a stick and roasted it over an open fire. Oddly, perhaps, I’ve never done the same to chestnuts. Anyway, I’ve roasted a marshmallow over a camp fire. I’ve engulfed a marshmallow in a camp fire flame and waved it around like some gooey torch. I may have, before I was saved, thrown that flaming gooey goodness at someone else. I had a brother and a host of boy cousins. We did things on camping trips that I, 35+ years later, look back at and wonder how we made it to adulthood with all of our appendages. But we did. Everyone of us. But I digress. The point is that I don’t toast marshmallows, and I don’t believe that you do either. I have a toaster that toasts bread which is, as far as I know, the only thing that you can toast. Someone will say “you can toast frozen waffles,” to which I’ll respond “okay.” I have always sung that line of the song as “marshmallows for roasting.”

B. I hate to be so disagreeable this morning, two weeks and two days from Christmas, but is there anyone that thinks scary ghost stories are fun AND that scary ghost stories have a place in Christmas? This year, kids, let’s forego the reading of the Christmas story and tell scary ghost stories instead! That’ll be a great way to settle you down for bed so that Santa can come and do his work, said no parent ever. If we told scary ghost stories in this house, we’d have kids running downstairs saying that they can’t sleep before Midnight Mass came on TV. It would be disastrous.

So, I’m curious, does anyone tell scary ghost stories during the Christmas season?

I intended to write a Christmas list post this morning, but I got a little sidetracked. Leah and I are buying each other (maybe) the Helinox camping chairs. Not to take camping, but because the chairs are lightweight and small and we can easily carry them while riding our bikes to the park or to games or to the mall (outdoor open space, not shopping center). John Grisham also has a new book out. I just don’t need or want much this year.

That’s all for today. Y’all have a great Friday and a great weekend. Only two shopping weekend left until Christmas!

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